It's no secret that I've been utterly frustrated with every aspect of my life lately. So naturally, I've been thinking about happier times. And it's funny: I zeroed in on 2008 and can easily say it was the best year ever. And yet if I could go back in time and ask my then 19-year-old self if she was happy, I'm pretty sure she would have said no.
2008 was one hell of a productive year. I finally got my driver's license (as well as my first car--a blue Kia Spectra). I did well in school and for the most part, loved my classes (one of which was a history class that made me hate the United States/capitalism). I read Toni Morrison, Joyce Carol Oates, and Margaret Atwood for the first time and wondered how I'd survived 19 years without their books. I listened to John Lennon's song "God" and suddenly wanted to strangle organized religion. I stopped being afraid to identify as a feminist. And I voted for the first time, in the presidential election. (Nice timing, right?)
I was incredibly frustrated most of the time, but it was the kind of frustration that motivated me to work toward something, which, I think, is very different from the frustration I'm experiencing now. (Is there a way to change that?)
So for now I am just going to drink wine and listen to Lady GaGa. If you've got better advice than that, let me know.
1 week ago